5 Years in the World of Oz

Exactly 5 years ago I woke up in the very early hours, after very little sleep and my Mum and my boyfriend drove me to the airport in Budapest. I was so excited that I don't think I realized how long it will be until the next time I will see them again. After re-packing my suitcases (because where can you find a girl who is able to pack less than 20kg for a year? Duh!), checking-in, making sure my Mum see; I do have my passport and insurance and all the important stuff on me; I was ready to say goodbye. I think my Mum cried, but she didn't want me to see it, she didn't want to ruin my excitement perhaps. She wanted to be happy for me eventho her heart was breaking inside.

I walked through the metal detector, sat down in the almost empty hall (because if you go anywhere with my Mum, she will make sure you'll rather be there an hour early than a minute late :)), I pulled out a cigarette, my phone rang - it was one of my best friends, she just woke up, I think it was only 7am, her voice was so sleepy still, but she called... To say goodbye. That's when it all sank in. I burst into tears and couldn't stop. I have never felt so alone in my entire life.

It was my decision, right? I was ready to get on that plane and fly 13,000 kms, leave family and love behind, get on with something new... But all of a sudden it was terrifying. Eventually I stopped crying of course - I think I just needed it so much that it couldn't stay inside :) - and 2 planes, 13,000kms and 24 hours later I arrived to where it all began... Sydney, Australia, The World of Oz, the Land of kangoroos and koalas and convicts and sunshine and the ozone hole... Oh it was a feeling like no others!

5 years, plenty of challanges, a few heartbreaks, some tears, lots of laughs and even more experience later; I am still here.
In the World of Oz. Where miracles do happen - I believe.

If I wouldn't have come here I wouldn't be the person who I am today (and you would probably not read this blog), so today (because it's been 5 years after all!) I'd like to thank Australia for all and everything - good&bad - it has given me because it truly was the best thing in my life so far!

Here to make more mistakes to learn from, more experiences to grow from and more friends to enjoy it with!

Thank you for everything, Australia. x

P.s.: My Mum's heart recovered since :)

My Amazing Mum - Maintaining Love from the Distance

This morning I woke up and realised that I haven't been in touch with my Mum in a good few days. I moved to the other side of the World 5 years ago therefore we usually chat online or email each other or talk on Skype but somehow we haven't done it for a few days now. I've also had a missed call on my phone from a blocked number which usually means an o/s call. This always makes me nervous and worried so I wanted to make sure it's all ok at home.

I started a long email to her because I felt guilty that I haven't made contact with her in the longest time. (Such a bad child.. I know!) I wanted to tell her how much I love her and miss her and that I think of her every day and feel bad that I got slack and only replied to her emails/chats instead of me starting one.

People who know me know that my lack of communication with home doesn't mean my lack of love for them. For a fact; my family is veryvery important to me. We went though a lot together and everytime something important happen to them over in Hungary and I can't be part of it, it makes me sad.
BUT! I'm coming from a familiy where I didn't see my Dad for weeks sometimes, but usually never more often than once a week. He was traveling all the time, so I grew up with his constant absence and learnt that love can be maintained without psyically being close to the person. I made a decision 5 years ago and my family knows how happy I am here. As hard as it is for all of us, they do understand (well I believe they do) why it's better for me here in Sydney than Budapest.

I wrote the longest email to my Mum about all and everything that has happened with me since we last spoke, how much i love her and my thoughts on visiting home this year. She is an awesome woman and honestly; I have no idea how she can cope with the void I left. Not that I'm that fantastic, but i'm her daughter. The only daughter. And however she's got my brother, his kiddies and the rest of the family there for her - I can't even start to imagine how hard it must be for a parent when they can only see their child once in every couple of years... And please don't think that it gets any easier with time passing. To tell you the truth it gets harder with every week and month. But we have to sacrifice whatever decision we make in life. Yes, I miss out on birthdays, weddings, baby births and a whole lot of other important occasions, but I try my best to make up for it everytime I visit home - at the end of the day I have to make more effort as I moved away from them not the other way around. And yes, it's so veryvery hard not to be able to go home to my Mum for some home made soup or a big hug when I'm upset or hurt, and it is even harder not to be there for my Mum when she's sad and she needs my hug. Of course it is hard to hear my brother telling me how sad he is that I don't see his kids grow up, but in his children's eyes I sure am the coolest aunty, who lives where the kangaroos live and send cool stuff occasionally (not to mention that I will reach a whole new level of coolness in those kids eyes when they can holiday in Australia in the school holidays!)... (At least this thought always makes me smile. I can't wait to have them here for a visit!)



All in all; I love my family.
And love means that you understand or at least accept your loved ones decisions in life. It is never easy, but whatever makes them happy, we have to let them go for it. And if you are in the same shoes as me, live far away from home by choice because you followed your dreams, but can't see your family whenever you want to; just think of all the happiness you've got from your furtunate situation to live somewhere amazing! I promise you, it will make them happy too!

Enjoy life! You've only got one to live!
Love passionately! You never know when it's going to end.
Be positive! Life if too short for spending it upset.

Have a Happy Easter!

Talking photography & what really matters

When I started my freelancing career as a photographer I've been told that in Sydney it is not easy to network with other photographers, they've got their own circles and they rather stay there than be open towards the newbies. Hm.

This thought comes back each and every time I come across a photographer who I get the chance to have a chat with. From my experience as long as I am open and not afraid to talk about what I do, how I do it - even if I know that some of it might not sound or be cool and fancy - the other photographer will be just as open and honest and friendly as I am. (And then we laugh together about how we battle between 2-3 jobs to make sure there's enough $ on the table to fund our businesses)

I went out with the girls last night. At the bar we've been directed to sit in an area which must have been reserved for someone before because there were only a few people sitting there. It also seemed to be the chilling spot for the photographer too who I happened to start chatting with. We ended up talking for a long time, it was probably more than what a noisy bar is designed for, but if you let me talk about photography then good luck to you; it will be a long one so you better get comfy and get yourself another drink before I start! :)

I really hope I didn't dominate the conversation too much or bore him. I think I let him talk too because however I really don't remember how long we were sitting there chatting, but I got this really sweet text message from this same photographer a little later:

"It was nice talking photography with you, it's great to see the passion you have, I'm sure you will be very successful."

I believe that if you leave the smoke and mirrors at home, keep your focus on what you love and talk about the bumps and holes too on that road you are on towards becoming a successful artist; people will be more interested in you and your work and encourage you much more. They might even look up to you and start to believe that only talking about the flash equipment or the next big thing on the market are not the things that will make anyone a bigger and better artist/business person.

What you really need in whatever business you are in is passion for what you do. It really is that simple.

Keep this in mind and thank me later. ;)

Daydreaming & learning to slow down

I often find myself daydreaming. The kind when you suddenly start thinking where you are at in life, what you do and what you are heading towards. (Yes. All the heavy stuff :))
Recently, I found myself in the office in the late hours of the night way too many times sorting images, uploading files, catching up on emails and so on. And then I go home, I realize what time it is - but first time in my life it doesn't bother me to live this way. That's what assure me that I'm at the right place. At the right time. And I shouldn't complain. Ever really.

I often find myself in a place where I am just happy for no particular reason. That's when I smile and feel that something tickly inside that I have no words for. (Mind you it might be just because English is not my first language.)

This afternoon I was shooting an apartment at Milsons Point, facing Luna Park. My client asked me to take some lifestyle/location shots so I wandered around the peer and found this:



I walk too fast. I keep myself busy all the time. And I mean; ALL the time! I get home at midnight and I still have things to do on my mind. And I must admit; I love it this way. However, shots like the above always remind me to stop and just take in the moment. (Sometimes I force myself to count to 10 if there's no other way to stop my head spinning...)

Remember: life is too good to miss out on the beautiful things. Stop. Take it in. And smile. :)

Have a great weekend World!

x

That special place in my heart - Bondi, Sydney, Australia

If you've ever been to Sydney, you probably came to check out this iconic beach. You may have been amazed by it or - like me back 5 years ago - a bit dissapointed that it's not like how you imagined. Bondi has got its reputation good or bad, but one thing is true: when you live in this area you definitely get introduced to a new face of it sooner or later.
I love my lazy Sundays. I love the walk along the coast to Coogee. I love the coffee from Gusto. And because it is one of those Sundays today, I'll get my bikinis on and head down to the beach and remind myself how great life is. Down Under. :)

Adorable baby session - Miss Sophie

One of my big love in photography is shooting babies (as you probably have seen it from previous posts) and last Saturday I thought I will try the "baby posing" (is there such a thing or did I just make that up in my head? How all those super-cute sleeping baby photos are made??). Well, Miss Sophie who was only 7 days old then thought she will be awake the whole time I'm there... Not to mention that she doesn't like to be naked, so my big plans on the cute sleeping baby photo didn't quiet work out as I planned..
At the end I still managed to come up with some lovely images and this session has reminded me again: photographing babies can't really be planned... :)







And while Miss Sophie had a break between shoots her big brother kept me company.. :)

Second shooting - and why you should go for it!

This blog post goes out as a massive thank you to the fab American photographer, Mike Larson.
I can't post photos from this wedding as it was Mike's gig (and his photos are sure way better than mine would ever be), however I definitely wanted to dedicate this post to him because the experience of the day I was assisting him provided me with more to learn than any books could ever do!

Firstly: when you hear you should do second shooting/assisting at a wedding even if you don't get paid for it, you should do it without hesitation! If you get the chance to work with someone like Mike, you will take more with you than the dollars you could make!

Secondly: I am not a wedding photographer and don't think I will ever be. But I truly believe that all photographers should gain experience shooting weddings, learn what works and what's not - from photographers who specialized in weddings.

And last: It was a long, wet day but I enjoyed every minute of it regardless of the amount of sand in my shoes or getting wet holding up the reflector, above the couple's head :)

Thanks Mike for being patient and cool even when my battery died..

Who's Mike? Check out his website...